How can I drastically change my life?

Have you ever asked,” How can I completely change myself?” Are you tired of yourself, who you are, and what you are doing? Do you wake up dissatisfied even though you may have the “good life” that we are all told is what we should be aiming for? Do you have a nagging feeling that you want something else, that something is missing in your life but you don’t know what it is?

It’s natural for us all to have questions and doubts, that is what being human is all about. There is nothing wrong with questioning your life and evaluating what you have, this is the way that you grow and improve.

As we move through life there are naturally going to be things that change, jobs, home, relationships, how we look, how we feel and how we think.

We are never going to be the same person at 50 that we were at 25. Our core values and beliefs may be the same but life changes us so much from learned experiences, good and bad.

As we age there are always going to be things that we want and need to change about ourselves and yet many people are reluctant to begin the process.

Why can't I change myself?

Change can come about in any number of ways. Through making decisions and by things seemingly just happening to us. Meeting a partner can seem like serendipity, you were both in the right place at the right time, yet changing careers can take numerous choices and soul-searching before the right one appears.

The qualities that we need to make a change in our lives are action and courage. If we don’t take a leap and move out of our comfort zone then change will never happen.

This is the problem for many, they want to make a change but fear holds them back from making the first move, and so they remain, unchanged in their comfort zone, even if it is the wrong decision.

What is it that makes fear hold us back? Why are we afraid to make changes when we know it will be a good move for us?

Usually, the reason for the fear that we have is that we are moving into the unknown and many doubts and insecurities can surface.

If something seems to be way out of reach then fear will creep into your mind and will start to tell you that you won’t achieve what you want.

When we have achieved something in the past, we have a visual memory of what it was like and this makes achieving the same thing or something similar in the future much easier. We will be less likely to be afraid if we have achieved a goal already.

Overriding fear in our brains can be difficult, and we will often give up and remain in our comfort zone rather than put ourselves in a position that seems too difficult, even if the result is something amazing.

But here is the rub, if you really want to make a change and expand your life, then you have to get out of your comfort zone and make life tricky for a while.

Imagine that you want to get fit and healthy. To achieve this you will probably have to change your diet and exercise habits.

This could mean giving up your favourite food, stopping drinking and exercising for more than you are used to.

You might have to hit the gym early in the morning, or not be able to sit watching TV in the evening. For many people making these sacrifices to get fit, being uncomfortable for a few months, wouldn’t be worth it and so they will stay the same.

Anyone willing to really push themselves and break through the fear and difficulties that adopting a new lifestyle brings, will have a great future of living with a fitter, healthier body that serves them far better, so the question is what would you rather do?

What do you want to change?

What are the things that you would like to change and how would you go about making the change? Do you want to change;

• your job?

• your relationship?

• your fitness?

• where you live?

• your social circle?

• your hobbies and pastimes?

• your financial situation?

• your health and well-being?

• your emotional health? your spiritual outlook?

Once you have decided what area of your life you would like to change, you can then go about changing it.

Remember, it is going to seem quite scary, but you have to work through these feelings, it’s all about getting to the other side, better and stronger.

How to make a change

The first step is deciding what it is that you want to change and the second is making a plan of change. Here are the steps you need to make a change permanent;

1. Set out a timetable

The best way to get results and stick to them is to give yourself a timescale. Saying “I am going to lose weight” isn’t the same as saying “I want to lose 10 pounds in 2 months. The timescale gives you something to work towards.

2. Make yourself accountable

Being accountable to somebody else is always more productive (hence the reason life coaching is so successful). Telling other people of your plans will mean you are far less likely to give up.

3. Treat yourself

Giving yourself incentives as you go along is a great way of sticking to your plan. Small treats at different goalposts along the way will keep you motivated to carry on to the end.

4. Don’t judge yourself

We are all human and there will be times when you may find that you succumb to old impulses, such as breaking your diet, or not exercising for a day.

At this point, don’t beat yourself up, instead, acknowledge that you have a human experience, be kind to yourself and start the next day again. Being self-critical will not serve you well, self-kindness will.

5. Make sure you are testing yourself

To make a change you need to make sure that you are really testing yourself. If you are not feeling uncomfortable then you are not making a change.

6. Keep a journal

Writing down how you are feeling and the experiences that you are having is another great motivational tool.

It will allow you to see habits developing that may slow your progress and so allow you to change them and it is also an excellent way of seeing how much you have progressed in a set period.

7. Identify any areas that may hold you back

To avoid failure, identify any areas that may hold you back. Look to remove tempting foods from the house if you are looking to lose weight, if they aren’t there, you can’t be tempted to eat them!

8. Make one change at a time

There may be several areas of your life that you would like to change but you will have far greater success if you approach them one area at a time. Taking on too much could leave you feeling overwhelmed and stressed and more likely to give up. Make one change successfully before moving on to another area.

9. Keep a check on that inner voice!!

Part of the reason it is so hard to make a change at times is because of the negative inner voice that whispers in our ears that something can’t be done. “You won’t lose the weight”, “It’s too hard, you might as well give up,” or “You’ll never achieve it.”

Shutting off our negative inner critics can be difficult, but knowing that they are going to appear at times will make it easier to shut them up. Have positive affirmations ready when self-doubt appears and you will have something positive to say to boost you up and keep you on track.

10. Hire an expert

We can all do with help at times and if you find that you are struggling to make a change by yourself, then hire somebody to help you. Life Coaches can offer you so many tools to aid you in achieving your goals.

They can hold you accountable so you are far more likely to succeed and can be there to offer you encouragement and help when you need it the most, making sure that you reach your goal and really make the change.

11. Make it a daily practice

To make real and lasting change in your life, it needs to become a habit and for this to happen you need to incorporate it into your daily routine. Your brain will quickly take on board the changes you are trying to make in your life if it is faced with them daily so start making the change you want a part of your daily routine.

12. Recognise destructive habits and eliminate them

No doubt the change that you want to bring about in your life is a positive change and so to make sure that you are successful, you need to recognise any destructive habits that you may have and start to eliminate them from your life to be successful.

If you continue with the bad habits that you are doing, you will never be able to bring about change.

13. Surround yourself with positive people

To give yourself the best chance of success, make sure that you surround yourself with positive people. The kind of people who are supportive, encouraging, helpful and who want you to succeed. With these people on your team, the possibility of bringing about long-lasting change is going to be much higher.

14. Develop a vision board of your perfect life

Not only is this a really helpful tool, but it is also a very successful way to instil change and is also great fun. Look at the areas that you want to change, and then start pinning out on a vision board your new reality. Go into as much detail as you can and then make sure that you study your vision board every day and really imagine you are living the change that you are looking for.

15. Set up your environment to promote the change you are looking for

If you are looking to lose weight, the best way to achieve this change is to have an environment that is going to be supportive of the changes that you will need to make.

That means getting rid of unhealthy food from your cupboards and filling them with foods that are going to be beneficial.

Your environment can play a crucial role in your success.

16. Step out of your comfort zone

This can be a challenge for some after all it’s not called a comfort zone for nothing but if you want to bring about change in your life, you are going to have to step out of your comfort zone because this is where the change happens.

By moving out of your comfort zone, you will automatically start to bring about change that you can then grow from.

17. Examine and refine your core beliefs

Are your core beliefs in alignment with the change that you want to make? Examining your core beliefs and refining them can make change much easier. If you are trying to promote a change that goes against your core beliefs, it will never happen or you will change back to your original version very quickly. Change has to be in complete alignment with your core beliefs to be achieved.

18. Make it fun and build in relaxation time

If it’s too much of a struggle or seems too much like hard work then you may find it difficult to bring about change, no matter how much better it may be for your life.

Try to make the change fun and make sure that you build in some relaxation time to your days to great and rejuvenate.

19. Have clearly defined goals and read them every day

Be clear on what you are doing and when, if you want to succeed. Clearly defined goals and targets will help you to process the change and will make sure that you are working towards it. Goals are also a way of letting you know how much you have achieved and how much further you have to go and are a good way of boosting your morale.

Final Thoughts

Change in life is always possible. Every day, somebody, somewhere has got out of bed with the attitude that today is the day that they are going to make changes in their life.

The only thing that can hold you back from making the change that you want is you!!

Developing a plan of change and sticking to it, should see change starting to appear faster than you may think.

Make today that you decide to change and who knows where you could be in six months.

If you would like to listen to the audio version of this blog post click the link below:

If you have any thoughts about changing yourself please comment and share below