What should you do to keep your relationships strong and happy?

Humans need contact and we need to have good relationships but many people struggle to find ways to keep relationships strong and happy.

We will all have many varied relationships during our lifetime, from school to work to home life and social life. These relationships will bring us joy and sorrow, will be complex and long-lasting, and fun and fleeting. They will see us through the good times and the bad times of our lives.

Healthy, strong, happy relationships have been shown to improve our mental health and happiness. The last year especially has demonstrated that the need for relationships is crucial to our well-being.

People who have healthy, happy relationships have been shown to have less stress and live happier more fulfilled lives.

Although each relationship we have can be different; work, personal, family, romantic, and friendships, they all need the same formula to make them work and flourish.

21 Tips for strong, happy relationships

Following these tips can aid in you nurturing healthy, happy relationships that work for everyone;

1. Communication

   Communication is the key to having, healthy, happy relationships. Talking to each other, and giving each other space to talk, is essential to honing healthy relationships.

   Communication means actively listening, asking questions, taking time for each other, and sharing thoughts, and ideas that will interest or aid those around you.

   Give each other space to speak, pay full attention, and don’t interrupt when a partner is speaking. Be honest and open with people. Talking about issues is the key to making sure relationships run smoothly.

   A communication breakdown can very often signal the end of relationships so working on this skill set is vital in all of the relationships that you have.

2. Respect

   Having respect for the other people in your relationships is another essential to building and cultivating close bonds. Having respect for your partner’s opinions and life choices should be a cornerstone of all relationships, whether it is a romantic or a working relationship.

   In life, we will all have differing opinions and at times we will never always see eye to eye but that doesn’t mean that one side has to change their opinion. Healthy relationships will blossom when both sides can hold differing sides and still have respect for each other.

   Respect also means being considerate of another person’s feelings. Being discreet when asked, without sharing private information and allowing each other time and space.

3. Boundaries

Having boundaries is needed in every aspect of life. In working situations, we all need to have boundaries to have a healthy working environment.

Respecting other people’s boundaries will help relationships to flourish. Boundaries will make us feel safe and secure, not do things that make us uncomfortable or unhappy and not take on more responsibility than we should.

Having great relationships means that you feel safe and secure expressing your boundaries and knowing that they will be respected and allowed. Boundaries should never be used to control one another, they are there to make relationships work happily and healthily.

4. Trust

We all need people we can trust in life. This is another essential aspect of a good strong relationship. Relationships that are not built on trust will never last. This is a huge aspect of every relationship that you will ever have. From an early age, we have learned how important trust is.

From trusting our parents and family during our formative years to trusting school friends and work colleagues, all relationships will be grounded in trust. Trust should be mutual and you need to remember that for many relationships, trust, in the beginning, may take time to grow.

For anyone who has had an abusive relationship in the past, learning to trust again is going to take time, patience, and understanding. Learning to trust in another person and letting yourself trust another person can add greater depth to every relationship.

5. Balance

All relationships need to have balance to function properly. As parents, you need time with children and away from them to have a fulfilling and happy life.

The same can be said for working relationships, you need time away from the people you work with to have a more rounded life. It is also true for romantic relationships and friendships.

No matter how much you love and care for another individual, having a rounded, more balanced life away from each other from time to time will be far more rewarding for your relationships than always doing things with the same people.

It offers variety, prevents boredom from setting in, lets you express and experience different interests and hobbies, and always gives you something new to talk about.

6. Have realistic expectations

Relationships will flourish if you have realistic expectations. Don’t forget we are all human and are liable to make mistakes and errors. No one is perfect and no relationship is perfect. You need to be realistic with each other and not expect too much.

Approach a relationship from the point of view of how you would like other people’s expectations of you to be. This will give you an idea of how you should approach relationships and the expectations you should have of others.

7. Set goals that you both want

Goals can be a driving force in a relationship but they can also be something that can cause major arguments and upsets.

When there is a real alignment of goals in a relationship, life can be exciting and wonderful. You need to talk through your partner's goals for the future so you are both on the same page when it comes to future plans.

If you are both looking for different things and don’t tell each other then there will be arguments and a breakdown of communication. Keep the channels of communication open when discussing future-focused goals.

8. Know when to allow space for the other person

We all need our own space and time alone. Healthy, respectful relationships are the ones that allow the other person to have their own time and space.

Spending time with a loved one is something that everyone needs to do for relationships to thrive but it is equally important to have your own time and space to do your own thing, without feeling that you are being selfish or neglectful of the other person.

9. Share chores

This is a big one and can so often be the catalyst to many broken relationships. If you feel that you are the one doing all of the chores or the person you live with avoids doing anything at all then this is something you need to work through pronto.

Chores around the house can lead to many arguments because one person can start to feel resentful and taken for granted. This is where you need to start communicating with each other. Devise a timetable for who does what and stick to it.

Don’t be tempted to correct someone when they are doing a chore, this will only prove that you want to be in control and do everything your way, meaning that next time this fact will be brought up.

Instead of shouting or getting frustrated, let your partner know that you would like them to help you and negotiate roles.

10. Plan days and dates for each other

Making each other a priority in life is a way to build closeness and longevity in a relationship. Planning special dates and days out for each other is one way to show how much you care and appreciate the other person.

These dates don’t need to be expensive or time rich, a walk in the park, a meal out, a weekend away or a simple coffee are all ideal ways to show how much you appreciate your partner and how much you like being in their company.

11. Have a fun time together

Whatever the relationship, you should be having fun in it. Whether it is a romantic relationship, family or friendship, a key component should be fun and laughter.

12. Be supportive in the relationship

A good starting point for healthy, strong relationships is to treat other people how you would like to be treated. Something that most of us seek from our varied relationships is support from other people.

Someone having your back and supporting you through life can mean that you are more willing to push yourself and take chances in life. It also acts as a safety net, knowing that there will be someone there to catch you should you fall.

Support goes both ways, give and take in a relationship is crucial, and you need to offer support as well as take support. This is another tip for keeping healthy, strong and happy relationships.

13. Compliment each other

Taking time out to say something complimentary costs nothing, but it is these small gestures that can make all the difference in relationships.

Paying someone a compliment can make their day. It can elevate another person’s mood and can boost their self-esteem when they need it.

If you love and care about someone, then you will no doubt be thinking complimentary things about them so instead of keeping them to yourself, spread the joy they will bring to others.

14. Be grateful for what the other person brings to the relationship

We can all bring different qualities to relationships. You

could have a person in your life who is super organised and brings calm and order to your life.

You could have people who are great fun to be with and lift you up when you are feeling down, or you could have someone who is loving and nurturing and who takes care of your emotional and physical needs.

Whatever qualities the other person brings to your relationship make sure that you are grateful to them for it and that you demonstrate this gratitude.

They in turn will be more likely to appreciate all of your qualities and be grateful for them.

15. Emphasise the positive aspects of the relationship

Life can so many times get in the way of the good stuff in relationships. External pressures of day-to-day living, pressures from other people, work whatever it may be, can sometimes mean that you can get bogged down in your life and that you don’t take time out to see all of the positive, good stuff that you have going on in your life.

Taking time to emphasise all of the positive aspects of your relationships can highlight to you the value that they bring to your world. Imagine how much poorer emotionally your world would be without them. You need to take time out to really appreciate them.

16. Stop yourself when you think of a critical thought

We can all be guilty of having critical thoughts towards other people. Often they may be a sudden outburst due to a driving incident or something you hear. The problem is, that we can often be too quick to judge other people and be too harsh.

It is always worth remembering, that we wouldn’t want other people thinking critically of us so we need to stop doing the same. Whenever you catch yourself thinking critically about someone you love stop immediately and change the negative thought to something positive. This will help to prevent arguments and bad feelings and to keep your relationships more harmonious.

17. Set positive goals for the relationship

Setting goals is helpful in all areas of life, even in relationships. Set yourself positive goals that you would like to achieve, whether that’s a holiday or a night out. A new job that will improve your standard of living or do DIY jobs around the house.

Positive goals will strengthen and enhance relationships.

18. Take time to listen to the other person

Everyone wants their voice to be heard, so when you are in a loving relationship, you need to give the other person time to express their thoughts, feelings, wants and desires.

You would want this level of respect to be paid to you so make sure that you are prepared to give it to someone else.

19. Be reliable in your actions

If you say you are going to do something, do it. If you promise someone something, see it through. Being unreliable and breaking promises is always going to cause friction and bad feelings in a relationship.

If you know that you aren’t going to be able to see a plan through or you will have to renege on a promise, tell the other person in advance and give a valid reason for doing so.

Respect is a cornerstone of all relationships make sure that you always show it.

20. Own up to your own mistakes

If you have made a mistake admit it. Don’t try to fob someone off with excuses or start putting the blame on someone else. Owning up to your mistakes means that someone is far more likely to forgive you or be understanding.

21. Be patient give it time

Good relationships can’t be rushed it takes patience and time for love, trust and understanding to develop. Be prepared to be patient and give your relationships time to grow, nurture and develop.

By being patient, you will end up with far more stable, committed and loving relationships that are built on respect trust and understanding.

Final Thoughts

Knowing how to keep relationships strong and happy can give us so much that we need in life.

From alleviating stress, anxiety, and depression, to forming ideas and communities that help us flourish and grow, building and maintaining relationships is the key to a happy successful life.

If you feel that you need some perspective on current relationships that you have or you need advice and help in nurturing new ones, then working with a life coach could be just what you need.

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Please comment and share if you have any more tips on keeping relationships strong and happy